Showing posts with label Adjusting. Show all posts

Starting March 22nd until April 8th. 2013, kids have off for the Easter holiday.  Two weeks!

(However, don’t quote me on those dates since I don’t have any school aged children yet). 

We decided that since some events like baby swimming were canceled for the holidays - we would head to the Jako-o / Haba Outlet in Bad Rodach, Germany. 

My first impression of this “adventure” was that there is no direct way to get from Rehau to Bad Rodach.  It was single lane roads almost the entire way (Route 173) with lots of slow trucks.  Basically, it wasn’t the most relaxing drive.  It is easier for folks driving from Erlangen or Nuremberg because they can take Highway 73 almost all the way up to Bad Rodach.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I brought my camera to take pictures and there were so many cute baby photo opportunities, but by the time we got to the store I was pretty exhausted… so I pocketed the camera and just enjoyed the store, time with my friends, and shopping. 

The outlet was nice inside, colorful, and there were LOTS of toys.  This picture above makes it look pretty spacious, but this was at the grand opening.  Since the grand opening they have added lots more merchandise, which is great, but with people, carts, and children the shopping space feels pretty tight. 

For shopping they had these roll-able high chairs, which I thought were really cute.  Basically they took highchairs and attached a mini shopping basket on the back and put wheels on the bottom.  Just flip a regular shopping cart around.  The only downside was the size of the basket.  It was only big enough to hold my diaper bag and jacket.  Which meant there was very little room to add anything that I wanted to buy.  But they did also have regular shopping carts with an attachment for your car seat; however, you couldn’t put a toddler / child in there so we couldn’t use the regular shopping carts.

Isaac didn’t really want to sit in a highchair after being in the car… so he headed straight to the shelves for some merchandise unstocking and restocking activities .  At one point I felt like I was at a yard sale with a pushy mom waiting to pounce on a toy I had in my hand.  The funny thing is that she asked me in English if she could have what I was holding.  I had to tell her that I was considering buying it.  I don’t think I have ever had that happen to me while I was shopping. 

But putting all the minor things aside here are my top favorites from the trip…

7 Reasons to Visit the Jako-o + Haba Outlet:

1.  They have a café. 

This was a great place to feed our babies, relax, and {if the weather had been nicer} enjoy the playground right on the other side of that sliding door. 

The food is not gourmet, but they have hot dogs, sausage, bread, soup, drinks, and lots of cake.  On the day we went, the, the café was packed! 

The café pictures are from the grand opening posted on the Jako-o facebook page.  Thank goodness they got new tables since the grand opening… see how {comfortable} that guy is on the left.  SOOOO glad they got different tables!  They actually use these wooden ones in the picture as benches to sit on now. :)

 

2.  The Outdoor Playground (Spielplatz). 

I wish wish wish – I had taken a picture of the playground.  I would love to play on this playground - even if I didn’t have kids.  I searched online for a picture of it.  I thought for sure Jako-o would advertise the outdoor play area as a really nice amenity, but alas no pictures of the play area were to be found online. 

I did find a picture of another Jako-o playground in Nuremberg.  Just look at this one and then scale it down a bit.  Too bad the weather wasn’t nicer and Isaac wasn’t a little older.  The main reason for us to come back sometime would be because of the playground. 

3.  The Indoor Play Areas. 

They had a play area downstairs for babies and toddlers.  It had a train track play table and a ball track.  The upstairs play area was for older kids (I liked it a lot better – plus there was more room for Isaac to actually play – the downstairs area was packed with strollers because there wasn’t any place to “park” them except for in the actual play area space).  The upstairs play area had an activity center box (which was good for Isaac), a climbing wall, ropes hanging from the ceiling that were attached to the floor to swing on and climb, a huge rocking horse, and big foam building blocks. 

4.  Crafts. 

They had a section upstairs devoted to crafts and learning products.  It is always fun to find craft supplies in Germany, since they don’t really have anything like Michaels or Joann Fabrics.  However, I didn’t need anything because I had just ordered some craft supplies from this website – Winkler.de.  It is mainly for school supplies, but they have A LOT of craft stuff.

5.  Nice Diaper Changing Room. 

It would be pretty weird if there wasn’t a place to change diapers – since it is a baby / child toy company.  Overall it was a nice room and they seemed to have thought of every amenity.  I liked the small port hole in the door so you are able to see if anyone is currently in the room without opening up the door.  However, it was a little strange to have port holes in the bathroom doors, but I am sure it is probably a good feature with small children using the bathroom.

6.  Good Deals. 

As far as I could tell you could get some great deals at the outlet.  One website I saw said that the prices were anywhere from 10 to 40% cheaper.  It is hard to say how good the deals were for sure because I haven’t been in Germany long enough to compare prices, but my German friends said they got some good deals.   

7.  Lots of different products. 

It isn’t a huge store, but they had women’s clothing, bathing suits (my friend got a bikini for 6 Euro’s – wow that sounds like a great price!), science experiment kits, craft stuff, dolls, stuffed animals, Legos / Duplo’s, gardening products, playing in the sand stuff, books, music CD’s, DVD’s, kid clothing, outdoor play toys, baby stuff, and they even had a MEGA stroller that fit 6 children (FYI - I am NOT in the market for one of these).

8.  The Shopping Bags. 

So this may sound really random, but I love the Jako-o shopping bags.  I even have a crafty / creative project in the works using the critters that I cut out of the bag.  Hopefully I can share my final craft project with you guys soon.  :)

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Unfortunately there is a pretty big downside to mention and no it wasn’t the drive home :) although it was another truck infested slow exhausting drive. 

The downside was that when I got home the two toys I bought weren’t really {DEALS} and one of the toys I bought was actually broken. 

I bought:

• Magnetic Alphabet for the Fridge – 6.95 Euro’s (Amazon.de price 8.90)
• Metallophon - 10.95 Euro’s (Haba online price 17.95).

Turns out the magnets on the alphabet letters are not as strong as I remember having in my set growing up.  It might just be another case of reducing manufacturing costs, but keeping the prices the same.  It isn’t horrible and they still technically work, but I was a little disappointed that they fall off the fridge with the slightest touch.  One review on Amazon.de  mentions that the magnets are not strong.  Uggh if I had known about the magnets then I wouldn’t have bought these.  I guess I could {try} to add additional magnets on the back to fix this.   

The real disappointment from the trip was the out of tune Haba Metallophon. 

The C and D notes sound more like C and D Flump.  It sounds good as you go up the scale and then you hit C… after that who knows what note you are playing.  Of course Isaac likes it because it makes noise, but it won’t work if he actually wants to play an actual song.  I tried “oh Susanna” and it was hard to tell that I was actually playing a song – it sounded more like a Chinese hymn.  Unfortunately, I can’t drive 260 Km round trip to exchange this toy – maybe I can contact Haba and they will have another suggestion. 

Overall the trip was good because we got out of the house, went on an adventure, saw new sights, learned new things, and we have shopping memorabilia. 

However, I will wait until the weather is really nice {not sure how long that will take} and Isaac is able to run around and enjoy the outdoor play area before I make another trip.

Also next time I go to Bad Rodach… I should consider going to this refreshing pool first.  That way I will be nice and relaxed for the Jak0-0 / Haba outlet shopping.    

PS – There are LOTS of other great Jako-o stores in Germany.  Click on the map for the locations.  The only other Jako-o store I have been to is Erlangen.  I enjoy that store because it is inside a nice mall; however, it doesn’t have the kind of play areas that the Outlet in Bad Rodach has going for it. 

  

Now that I have been in the midst of {Culture Shock} for 8 months – I can confidently say we need to change this label.  The words culture shock don’t really convey what is actually happening.

I am not constantly shocked by the culture.

When I hear the words culture shock I picture someone walking around in a zombie like state with their mouth hanging open in awe and shock.  

Here are some suggestions that I think more accurately describe the situation:

• Transition Fatigue
• Cultural Adjustment Transition Syndrome (CATS)

My Favorite :)

• Language Isolation, Frustration, and Eventually Tough Decisions Syndrome (LIFTEDS)       

I manipulated that one - just so it would almost spell something :)

• Life Turned Upside Down Condition (LTUDC)

Sounds like a good cake

• Put your Whole Head in and Shake it all about Confusion 

Other wise known as the Hokey Pokey Syndrome…

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But seriously.  Who decided to call it culture shock? 

Let’s start calling it Cultural Adjustment Transition Syndrome (CATS).  It would also be great if we could rename one of the stages because I am in full blown Transition Fatigue.   

There are a lot of positive benefits to changing the term to CATS.  We can:

1.  Relate to more people.  The new terminology allows people going through cultural changes to also relate to people experiencing several life changing events all at the same time.  Like a new baby, job change, and a major move. 

We might have different stories, but underneath we are ALL very similar and can relate to each others Transition Fatigue symptoms. 

2.  Feel more understood.  The term culture shock has left me feeling misunderstood and misrepresented.  The new term will hopefully convey the right message. 

Cultural Adaptation Transition Syndrome (CATS) will now make me feel described as someone who is - adjusting and adapting with all the NORMAL ups and downs while also experiencing set backs, frustration, and anger, but also growing and seeing good changes happening, realizes that there have been some amazing blessings along this journey so far, and yet exhausted from the changes and the thought of a million more adjustments and changes to come.  (excuse the run on sentence) 

ALL of that is normal and natural.  By not going through these stages - I might not grow as much as a person.  I would be numbing myself and not truly living an authentic vulnerable whole hearted life if I didn’t truthfully live and breath these stages.  So I will take the down moments, the pain, the confusion, the disconnection, the anger, and the frustration because I know it is strengthening me – I won’t wish it away and I won’t rush through the transition stages because I can learn something in each stage about myself and about others. 

(Note – It is wonderful that others have already gone through this and can see these stages from the “other side”.  Those people can be a great blessing in your life if they are good listeners and can relate to you without pushing you to be where they are now.  They have the benefit of time and space to reflect and see what they learned.  Just like parenting, we want to teach our kids every tough lesson we ever learned, but sometimes the best thing we can do is let them know we love them, offer them grace and forgiveness when we see them making our same mistakes, and give them what we wish others had given us – lots of understanding and a shoulder to cry on if they need it.)

3.  Remove the Zombie Shock Image.  With the new term I can finally delete that image of a Zombie walking around in shock.  Instead, I can now confidently embrace the image of a person taking normal adjustment steps towards transitioning into a new country, language, culture, home, and way of life. 

4.  It is a Great Acronym.  Not only does it accurately describe the situation, but the name spells CATS.  And when you are going through Cultural Adaptation Transition Syndrome (CATS) sometimes all you need is a little bit of laughter to brighten your day. 

 

Image Credits:

http://www.halloweenclipart.com/halloween_clipart_images/a_boy_dressed_as_a_zombie_for_halloween_0515-1010-0904-2216.html

http://www.fanpop.com/clubs/cats/images/8477439/title/cute-cats-photo

As I mentioned in a previous blog post, the focus on Monday’s Post will be the differences that I see between the US and Germany.  I have been living here for about 8 months (oh my gosh it has been 8 MONTHS) and my current stage of culture shock is where I can observe differences without getting too worked up about them.  At least not ALL the time.  But I still have ups and downs.  I am also slowly {starting} to see myself come up with solutions to differences and creating new pathways forward in life.   

In the US, a lot of parents, grandparents, and care givers take their babies and children to storytime at the library.  I started taking Isaac when he was just a couple months old.  I didn’t realize how much I liked that kind of program until I arrived in Germany.  The first thing I did when we arrived here was go to the library in Rehau.  BUT it turns out that the library here has really limited hours and barely any programs for kids and NO programs for babies. 

The difference is….. the library in Germany isn’t a source of community events like it is in the US.  Instead there are multi-generation houses that serve as a source of community events and programs.  They have things like musik class and they can help network you to mom groups with local churches or the La Leche League.  I can post another time about the mom groups and programs I have discovered in the Hof / Rehau area.

{I have to note that we live in a really small town in a quiet area of Germany so there might be more resources and programs at your library if you live near a bigger city in Germany.} 

But basically, I went to as many mom groups as I could find and did a musik class, but it all still left a huge {storytime sized hole} in my heart.   I missed storytime.

To fill this hole – I decided to start my own storytime group.  So far it has worked out great and might even be better than if I had found a storytime at the library.  I enjoy having mom’s and babies over to our house.  The atmosphere is relaxed and we enjoy books and songs in both English and German.  It will help me learn more German in a fun way and the other kids will be exposed to some English.  It is so great that I have met a really wonderful group of mom’s who want to come over each week. 

Because I think it would be helpful to other mom’s or even folks who are at the early stages of learning German – I will start posting the program that we do each week.  Maybe another mom somewhere in the world wants to do something like this with their kid, but just needs some ideas.  

The BEST part is that this storytime program pushes me to search out children’s songs and books in German, learn more German words as I write down the program each week, and clean my house. 

Lots of Love, Judi

Image credit:

http://www.psbnyc.com/about_us/index?tag_name=childrens_story_time

One driving adjustment that I had to make over here in Germany was learning to play the game of chicken with on coming cars driving down narrow roads.  Of course there are US cities with narrow roads and there are wide roads in Germany, but on average the streets here are pretty narrow.  Some roads are two way roads, but with cars parked on the sides of the streets they turn into roads only wide enough for one car to pass.  This might be expected to happen more on side streets or residential neighborhoods, but there are MANY main roads that are really narrow here in Germany. 

For example, in our small town the main road that goes through the center square has a section that narrows right by the butcher shop, bio market, and bakery.  It is a pretty busy intersection, but the road isn’t wide enough for parked cars and two cars to drive in both directions past.  So you have to stay on your toes driving and constantly judge in advance, who you think will win the game of chicken…  will you get through the narrow space first or will you have to duck over into a small spot between two parked cars (if you are lucky) and let the other car pass? 

(Photo – This is Burgstrasse in Rehau, Germany.  We lived in temporary housing here for 6 months.  It is officially a two way street, but with the cars parked on the side only one car can drive down this street at a time.  This street is right off of the main street going through town.)

* FINAL DISCLAIMER – I want to make one more disclaimer about the “Monday Weekly Post @ What I Miss the Most” – it could more accurately be described as “Monday’s Post Will Be @ the Differences I See”.  It is less a focus on missing things, but more a focus on the differences.  Maybe I will change the label….. but I really like the rhyme and catchiness of the first one :) 

What do you guys think?  Change it or leave it the same?

Hopefully it will be good to document the cultural differences that I see here in Germany.  Someone else moving to Germany from the US might appreciate reading about the differences and maybe they will relate, laugh, or connect with these posts.  I can only hope that my posts help just one other person.  Lots of Love – Judi

This next Random Act of Kindness was a lot easier to do than the first one.  Even I was able to do this one without too much language barrier issues.

Turns out the body language for “do you want to go ahead of me in line?” is really easy to do:
FIRST – You look at your pile of groceries in your cart or on the conveyor belt and you look at their carts or hands with just a few items (of course you can do this act of kindness for someone who has the same or more groceries than you, but most of the time I have more groceries than the people behind me :)
SECOND – You give a general motion to wave them ahead of you, smile big, and step aside / make space for them to pass you
THIRD – You continue to smile and nod politely as they make some small talk and move ahead of you in line
This act of kindness normally goes off without a hitch and most people appreciate it here in Germany.   The only downside (for me) is that sometimes people then want to chat and make some kind of small talk after I let them go ahead of me in line.  For me personally, I feel bad telling them that I don’t know how to speak German.  The worst is when someone is making small talk and I am nodding along and smiling and they pause with a funny expression and I get the feeling they just asked me a question or expected a different response than me nodding my head.  I am sure I will get used to that feeling, but for some reason my default internal judgment meter goes into melt down mode and I equate not speaking the language as I am being rude and unable to communicate with them. 
(SIDE NOTE - I {know} logically that I am NOT being rude, but I still feel bad inside that they want to talk with me and I can’t communicate back… just being honest) 
Another result of this Random Act of Kindness is that it made me curious about the topic:  “Standing In Line in Foreign Countries”.  The Wayward Traveller has a post about standing in line in Italy.  (you can also click on the photo to see that post).
After reading a few websites – it turns out Germany is not too much different than the US when it comes to standing in line.  Here is one website where I enjoyed reading someone’s descriptions of lines…
“In Germany there are not so many "queue management systems", […]without these systems, the line forms a shape similar to a swarm of angry bees trying to exit a funnel at the narrow end. This causes Unordnung which many Germans are not normally accustomed to dealing with. This Unordnung brings Germans out of their normal comfort zone in which they are normally told or shown what to do. Most Germans can handle this and they remain polite and civil. However, some of them, without this corralling authority, revert to the law of the jungle and begin to flip out, because to them it means complete and total anarchy where they are no longer responsible for their actions. These actions might include pushing, shoving, […] and, in the worst cases, addressing each other in the informal 2nd person.”
I hope I am never in an altercation in Germany where the tension and anger level gets so out of hand that it forces someone into using the informal 2nd person!
Hope you enjoyed reading!  Lots of Love – Judi
Photo credit for people standing in line – The Ivy Coach.

This Monday is the start of “What I Miss the Most…”.  But first I need to make some disclaimers / notes about this topic:


1.  I miss Family and Friends – !!{THE MOST"}!!  When we were in the US – I had a whole network of people to call / text / email.  Now I rarely talk on the phone and I feel disconnected from home.  This probably happened for several reasons: 

• We lived in temporary housing without the internet and a landline for 6 months.  This created a gap in our communications - people couldn’t call us and we weren’t able to regularly call them.
• The 6 hour time change.  When Isaac goes down for his morning nap it is 4:30 am in the US.  {if anyone is up – you are welcome to call us}
• We can’t talk with family and friends on our cell phones – unless we want to go into debt.  That means it isn’t always easy to get a hold of us and even when we are home – sometimes our internet phone isn’t working. 

Hopefully over time we can re-establish our connections with loved ones back home now that we have the internet again.     
 
2.  Things that I miss are just that – things that {I} miss.  It might not be something that other people miss and it might not make any sense to someone else, but it is something that I have had to navigate my way to a solution because I miss it.


3.  Over time {lots of time} I will become more comfortable with living here and I will miss less and less things from home.  And I might even discover that there are things in Germany that I will miss when we move back to the US.  Eventually, I might start posting  “Tuesday I’ll Write @ Something I like” :)

4.  I might have discovered some kind of solution for what I miss, but it doesn’t mean it is the best.  Any advice or tips are {Greatly} appreciated!  There are many ways to get to the same result and the best thing about the internet is learning from each other and finding more paths to solve similar problems.
SOOOOO Here is the first thing that I missed….  FLOSS!
I was not expecting this AT ALL!  I had a couple extra packages in my luggage and in our shipping container, but I expected that I would eventually find a woven un-waxed floss here in Germany.

I search high and low – I went in every Rossman, DM, Apotheke – all to no avail.  I bought SIX different kinds, I asked my German friends about their floss, and then I asked to see their floss {not a typical conversation to have with a new friend}.  

The woven floss I tried here lost it’s woven-ness after 2 teeth.  Another floss I tried, had a thin beginning and one thick short blue end, which made it hard to wrap around my fingers and it still lost it’s woven-ness after just a couple teeth.  Other floss’s were thin and silky. 

The thing is…. my dentist {that I miss} recommended that I use the woven unwaxed floss because I have some space between my bottom teeth and regular silky thin floss just doesn’t work for me. 

What did I do to solve this situation?  I asked my Mother In Law to throw some floss in a letter and mail it to me.  Seriously – just the spools of floss and not even the plastic container.  It cost about $4 to ship me some spools of floss, but now I have enough to last me until we go back to the US for a visit this summer. 

Now one of my pieces of advice for anyone moving internationally is to bring enough critical toiletries / personal care items that you feel comfortable with.  Somethings I don’t mind switching like my shampoo and conditioner, but if there is a personal care item that you really don’t want to switch (just yet) make sure to put it in your luggage or shipping container when you move.

Lots of Love – Judi 

When we first moved here it was really hard to adjust to ALL the stores being closed on Sunday’s. 

Here’s the thing.  I don’t really mind the stores being closed on Sunday’s, but the difficulty is when:

• Stores close at 6 pm on weekdays (Edeka is open until 8 pm)
• We live in a small town (it is possible that stores stay open later in bigger cities)
• We have a very small fridge and we don’t have a freezer, which makes stocking up on meals and food difficult
• Chris works until 5 or 5:30 pm everyday
• Because of the language barrier (especially the first 6 months) I didn’t want to go shopping without Chris
• We had lots of “settling” in to do – looking for housing (which involved tons of appointments), license plates, visa’s, drivers license, bank accounts, cell phones, trying to get the internet to work on our computers (total failure) – all of this took up tons of time during the week.

So that left Saturday as the ONLY day we could run any errands – diapers, groceries, etc…

• AND some stores close even earlier on Saturdays! (Noon or 2 pm)

The main problem was IMMEDIATELY when we moved here. 

It was really stressful to create any kind of routine or “normal” life because there was just so much chaos and we had soooo many errands to run and only one day on the weekend to do it all in.  There were many things we didn’t anticipate or predict in our temporary housing situation.  We had to run out to the store often and pick random things up that we forgot or needed.  Sometimes we had to go back to the same store – in the same day - because we forgot something.  Things that should take people a short amount of time was taking us HOURS to accomplish. 

In addition, because of our small fridge / no freezer combo and our inability to remember that the stores are closed on Sundays we found our selves without enough food for Sunday evening and Monday morning on several occasions. Combine all of this with not knowing exactly what store you need to go to find what you want (i.e. lots of inefficient shopping trips) and it is a recipe for wanting stores to be open on Sundays. 

We have been here for 6 months and we are finally moving into our rental house this coming weekend.  Our “settling” in errands are now mainly focused on the house and not as scattered as before.  I am a little more comfortable with going to certain stores without Chris and we also know where to find some of the things we need.  Sooooo I guess it isn’t as big of a deal that ALL the stores are closed on Sundays.  (but my blood still runs American and I frequently wish stores were open on Sunday’s)  

Now if Target would just open up a store in Germany… a girl can dream!

Before we left for Germany, Isaac was sleeping 8 to 10 hours straight at 6 months old.  It was heaven.  However, when we moved from the US to Germany his sleep became a nightmare.  Turns out the reason why Isaac was restless and screaming in the middle of the night - was due to ALLERGIES.  I wish it didn't take us 3 months to figure that out.  But once we did, he has started to sleep again.

It has been two months since we moved to Germany.  The second month flew past like a car driving 180 kilometers per hour on the autobahn.  Here might be some reasons that the second month went so quickly:

We have been living in Germany for ONE month!  We have:

• Enjoyed BBQ's and Kaffee and Kuchen with new friends
• Travelled to - Magdeburg, Erlangen, Coburg, Bayreuth (and local towns around Rehau)
• Hiked at - Waldstein, Waldbad, Luisenburg Rock Labyrinth
• Found a great church in Selb -  http://www.efg-selb.de

  

Rolling and almost Crawling - There is no longer a guarantee that Isaac will be in the same place that you left him.

Disposables - I never thought I would say this, but I miss cloth diapering.  I haven't met anyone over here that uses cloth diapers.  We wanted to get through this initial adjustment before adding cloth diapers back into our lives.  

Left Handed - I have learned to peal carrots left handed.  (Random things you learn when you don't have your own kitchen utensils.) 

10 to 6 - That's not Chris's new working hours, but the change in my pant size.  As a moving bonus - I have lost all of the baby weight.  The final weight dropped off really fast because of moving stress, walking everywhere, and my inability to grocery shop or cook food in a foreign country.   

Disconnected - We don't have cell phones, internet, or a home phone.  It was a nice vacation from technology, but it has been a month and I am ready for a little bit more connectedness.  (Unfortunately, we might be disconnected for another month or even until November!)

Outdoor Internet Cafe - Since we don't have the internet, we have to sit outside in our courtyard to get online.  It is great that we have a nice garden.  But the downside is that on rainy, cold days, we can't get online very easily.   

Place to Live - The most stressful thing so far is trying to find a place to live.  There isn't much for rent in this area and it is an emotionally up and down process.  If anyone wants to say a prayer that we find a house to rent (and soon), we would super appreciate it!  

In summary, this has been one of the most exhausting months of my life.  It almost trumps the first month after Isaac was born.  We experience so many new things in just one day..... that time has slowed down so we can fit more than 24 hours into one day.  That might sound like fun for a little while, but I don't think my brain was wired to process this much information each day.